I Started Watching Blue Films at the Age of ten, Now See What It Has Done To Me
It may sound strange to many people why I was exposed to pornography at the age of ten. It was certainly not my fault because, at that tender age, I could differentiate between good and evil.
I come from a very affluent background so growing up, I was exposed to many modern equipments that enabled me access to audio and video contents.
My late father was living in London and was a dealer in DVDs and other electronic devices and periodically brought those machines down to be sold. My mother too was a very busy businesswoman and was always absent from home.
I came home from school one afternoon and found a disc on my mother’s center table and decided to watch the content of the disc.
Amazingly, the disc contained loads of pornographic videos. My curiosity then arose and so I marked that disk down to be able to distinguish it from the other discs. Anytime my mother was not around, I sneak into her room and watch the videos for hours.
The watching of the videos continued for months without my mother noticing what I have been doing in her absence.
Unfortunately for me, my mother was the strict type and never allowed me to go out or make friends outside so I used all my time watching the videos.
I started practicing some of the scenes I watched in the videos by inserting all kinds of items into my private part including my fingers
This continued from the JHS through to the university because I was not allowed to stay on campus thinking I could be influenced by bad company.
I became so obsessed with pleasuring myself to the extent that, I could not go a day without inserting something into my private part.
As a result of my devilish acts, I never had an interest in dating any guy. I turned down all proposals from guys because I had no feeling for men.
No Matter what some guys did, they still could not get my attention and I usually end a relationship if the guy tries to get intimate with me.
Because I never introduced any man to my mother, she thought I was still a virgin and always talked to my father about how good I was.
My father loved me to the core and did virtually everything I requested from him.
I have completed the university now and gainfully employed. Sadly, what I have to grapple with now is my lack of interest in men. Many men have approached me for marriage but I have declined all of them.
I accepted one guy’s proposal but after we were through with all the preparations towards marriage, my interest in the relationship dwindled and finally quitted.
I am now in my late thirties and still not married despite being financially stable than many married women I have come across.
Aside from my lack of interest in marriage, I have also developed some chronic vaginal infections as a result of the things I usually insert into my private part.
I now feel I have ruined my life and seriously need help
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